Day Five
We are halfway through our trip. For me, the journey is only beginning. It’s an irksome task to summarize my emotions and I know I will cherish these experiences for a lifetime. The last 24 hours have changed my life forever. Since last night, we visited the Kotel, Yad Vashem and we are now in the Negev at a Bedouin camp. In the last 24 hours, I have found myself, my family and my people.
At the Kotel, I knew that lightning could strike and that there was a chance of deep spiritual enlightenment. I was not disappointed. When my forehead met the stone, I soared through history and saw my family. I connected with Hashem for the first time in my life. You cannot imagine the emotions that overcame me as I finally realized what it means to be a Jew. The spirituality of the moment was absolutely overwhelming and I am now counting down the seconds until I return to the Kotel. To pray at the most holy site of Judaism and to find my identity as a Jew has changed me forever.
The eve of Yad Vashem brought on serious dread. The hometown of my family in Lithuania was wiped out during the Shoah. To experience Yad Vashem with so many Americans and Israelis with deep and painful connections to the Shoah was incredibly moving. In the museum, there were a few moments that absolutely struck me like a punch to the gut. The museum opens to a movie of Jewish life before the Shoah. I saw my Great Great Great Great Grandfather Mordechai and his family enjoying normal life. The film ended with a young Hasidic boy and I felt like I was looking in a mirror through time.
I spent the tour wishing it would end and looking for the light at the end of the tunnel. We couldn’t know when the horror would end – just like the victims. At the Hall of Names, I was overcome with emotion when I saw that the folder of names ending in “Ko” was adjacent to “Li.” My name ends in Ko and my best friend’s ends in Li. I looked at the faces of those we lost and was struck again by lightning as I made eye contact with the portraits of those we honor and remember.
We exited Yad Vashem to the most beautiful and peaceful view of a sunny day in Jerusalem. We were able to enjoy what our people and family will never be able to enjoy. As I looked around, I was comforted by our tight knit group of Americans and Israelis. I was inspired by the IDF groups and so many others that were visiting. We are still here, we will not forget and we will always honor the memories of those that were taken from us.
To spend the midway point of our journey in the Negev only adds depth to the spiritual discovery that I have enjoyed in Israel. To see the stars and hear the silence of the desert continued my connection to thousands of years of Jews who have come before us. This trip has changed my life and it’s simply awesome to consider that we have much more ahead over the next few days. I will wrap tefillin for the first time as the sun rises over Masada. I cherish every moment we have had as Bus 17 and look forward to a lifetime with my new friends.
